Most of us who love an addict are playing a part in the addiction. In our attempts at lending a hand, we tend to take on an enabling(psst-i can't stand that word) role. We're wired to protect our family, so of course we enable to a fault. No one WANTS to kick their family member out on the street. So when I say be less codependent, I mean gain control over the dynamic in the family and the addict/alcoholic.
What Does Codependency Look Like?
Making excuses or playing down your loved one's addiction to alcohol/drugs
Taking on more responsibilities either financially or physically in your household
Mending broken relationships caused by your addicted loved one
Have a fear of being abandoned and alone
You try to please others instead of yourself
If any of these struck a chord within you, you definitely want to learn the 3 steps in breaking this unhealthy pattern that we go over in this video.
How to Break Codependency:
Step 1 - Define it for yourself! The first step in changing unhealthy behavior is to understand it. It's important for codependents and their family members to educate themselves about the course and cycle of addiction and how it extends into their relationships.
Step 2 -Gain control! Make strategic decisions, not emotional ones. You have to have a strategic plan for every situation that can and most likely will happen. Don't get hooked into being the bad guy role. (click HERE to see if you've been hooked) If you've already been hooked into that role, you definitely need step number 3...
Step 3- Finding a trusted advisory! That could look like a recovery coach, counselor, friend or a sponsor. The only thing I ask, is to pick someone that has had experience in this complicated dynamic. Addiction does not play by the normal, universal rules and laws. You need someone who specializes in addiction. If you don't have anyone that comes to mind that could be that person for you, these resources can help serve as that trusted advisory:
Subscribe to our channel so that you can understand addiction from every angle. This will help you get your family back on track!
Join our closed family recovery group on Facebook.
Reach out to one of our specialist in our office. We'll be happy to help coach you through! https://www.hopeforfamiliesrecoverycenter.com/
The more you understand codependency the better you can cope with its effects. Reaching out for information and assistance can help someone live a more fulfilling life.